Gliding Serpent Motorsports online store now open!

By popular request, we are happy to announce that Gliding Serpent Motorsports has opened an Official Team Store!

Thank you for shopping at our online store. If you would like to submit an order, or have any questions about shipping or our products, email us at Gliding_Serpent@Hotmail.com. Click small pictures to get a larger view.

We accept

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Item 001: Gliding Serpent Motorsports "98% of the way there" T-Shirt

Celebrate the Serpent's inaugural 2010 entry into the ALMS GT2 class with this cool new tee. The image shows the No. 95 Porsche in all it's press release glory. We have printed only 50 shirts total, so get one soon! Printed on a white 60% organic cotton tee by AlmostOrganics.

$50.00

Sizes: S/M/L/XL/Fatty



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Item 002: Gliding Serpent Motorsports "You are welcome!" T-Shirt

Everyone loves the Serpent with his feel-good wit. Show how much you love him, and adore his every word, with this "You are welcome" T-Shirt! Shirt front shows the No. 95 Porsche in all it's press release glory (see item 001). We have printed only 50 shirts total, so get one soon! Printed on a white 60% organic cotton tee by AlmostOrganics.

$50.00

Sizes: S/M/L/XL/Chubba-dub
(only 48 left!)

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Item 003: Gliding Serpent Motorsports "Frigging Joke" T-Shirt

Celebrate the birth of the Gliding Serpent's "World Class (TM) and one-sidedly positive view of all things ALMS" blog of all things truth related with this new shirt. Re-experience the classic moments of offensive comments after post #00. Shirt front shows the No. 95 Porsche in all it's press release glory (see item 001). We have printed only 50 shirts total, so get one soon! Printed on a white 60% organic cotton tee by AlmostOrganics.

$50.00

Sizes: S/M/L/XL/Tubby

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Item 004: Gliding Serpent Motorsports "every meaningless point" T-Shirt

Forum pest or World-Class(TM) Hero? Whatever your views, pay tribute to the classic americanlemansfans.com moments whenever you wear this shirt. Shirt front shows the No. 95 Porsche in all it's press release glory (see item 001). We have printed only 50 shirts total, so get one soon! Printed on a white 60% organic cotton tee by AlmostOrganics.

$50.00

Sizes: S/M/L/XL/metabolic-disorder

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COMING SOON: Gliding Serpent Motorsports personal lubricant

14: The shape of the ALMS to come: Part 5 of 7

As promised here is the Serpent's outlook for the future of the Prototype divisions in the ALMS:

As a quick recap... 2011 will be a year of glorious change for P1. P1 in 2011 will basically be our current P2 (an oversimplification but as far as the casual ALMS fan is concerned... it all looks the same after a few beer). Today's P1's will go way of the dodo. Be excited. This will be greater than anything sports car fans could ever imagine.

What of Audi and Acura the P1's?

A tough situation so I will address it first. The answer, dear fans, is "It depends."

Option 1: Audi and Acura milk their current P1 cars for all they are worth. If they both come knocking on the door for a full season next year... expect them to bring $$$ (i.e. music to cash starved ALMS ears). We all know money talks, so expect rules to keep them on top of the prototypes. The good side of this is that Acura vs: Audi would make for good racing, even if it is only 4 cars. Just remember that these cars are going way of the dodo. Next year may be their last horrah unless they can use their money and influence to change a few minds.

Option 2: Only one of the above returns. If this is the case, the carrot to keep them/attract them will be a promise of performance superiority. BUT, to keep things interesting for fans, there will effectively be one prototype division as far as the actual races go. P1 cars will still have the edge, but they will be reigned back (think 2008).

Option 3: Audi and Acura don't return to P1. This is a worse case scenario, but actually makes a lot of sense given the rule changes for 2011, and current economic conditions. I think this option will make grown men cry on the forums. The casual sports car fans won't notice the difference however. (As if the simpleton casual fan would notice the lack of the fancy silver cars with the Olympic rings. I also doubt they would notice the time difference when they watch the race on TV, Monday morning, at 2am, a week after the actual race.) I would expect a few P2 Acuras to remain as they are good little cars and should be easy as my grandmother's pear-pie recipe to convert to 2011 regulations. Just a few year-to-year upgrades. No Biggie. Expect a resurgence of the Porsche Spyder in privateer hands for similar reasons.

In summary:

My prediction? I don't expect a huge economic recovery, but a gradual improvement next year. As a result, I would not be surprised to see factory P1's go the way of the dinosaur next year in the ALMS. Expect the remaining P1's to be corralled towards 2011 P1 specs/performance. Next year, today's P2's will take the spotlight race to race (that means more $$$). Don't worry though, the factory P1 dino's will arrive for the larger “Intercontinental Cup" type races in the US. Also, expect the Challenge class to reach it's full potential and open up to entries outside of the Patron 911's. GT1 will stay dead in 2010 and be replaced by the more economical P2 class in 2011 (unless Nissan lights a fire...).

Maybe not an ideal picture, but a Porsche/Acura/Mazda three-way would not be so bad, especially if they can attract more funding now that they would be the premiere class. Throw in a couple of neutered R15's and we have a horse race again.

You are Welcome.

Gliding Serpent Motorsports presents...

Official announcement to follow.

13: The shape of the ALMS to come: Part 4 of 7

Step one. Monopoly.

Let us begin with where I left off in Part 3:

Get rid of your opponent... or buy it and own it. Here is the twist: Money grubbers also call the shots on the NASCAR side of the fence. Which series can make them the most money? Hint: money grubbers want to grub money from as many people as possible. They already have the money of NASCAR fans... so they want control of a series with a different appeal/fan base. Guess who? The # of fans in the GA stands is your hint...

The powers that be (the grubbers) want a monopoly on racing in North America. Sports cars is the next demographic on their list. So enter the purchase of Grand Am.

So why Grand Am and not the ALMS in the first place? Simple: because Grand Am was basically thrown at them for pennies. The problem is that they bought a near dead series as far as fans are concerned. Throw in the bad economy, and even our NASCAR boys are struggling to market the series, and the losses increase. Time for Plan B, and I am not talking about you niece's dirty little teenage secret with Bobby...

Plan B: Kick them when they are down

The ALMS is struggling too if you have not noticed. No major sponsor, cutbacks, layoffs, reduced quality of TV coverage, desperate attempts to fill out grids. Teams are worrying... and in swoops GA/NASCAR for the kill. Too proud to sell to us before? Well now you are too far in debt to stop us from picking you apart!

But should Grand Am (who are we kidding... NASCAR) buy the ALMS? Should they just buy the rights to Dons tracks (read: Sebring) and leave a carcass behind?

How do you buy out all or some of a series and not have it turn up the next year in a different form... competing for your dollar? Hint: Buying Sebring will not save GA from itself. The grubbers know it.

Grand Am needs to remove the competition. Step one: Forget the label of the ALMS at the moment. Look at it as 25 or so cars with support teams, sponsors, principals, drivers, and fans. Look at Grand Am the same way. Who has more money? Who attracts more fans? Who brings in more sponsorship dollars? Now add Jag and Corvette to the deal... Audi too. Who is bigger now? Who do you think the money grubbers at NASCAR want to put their money behind?

The plan forward is getting mighty simple and obvious...

But what about loyalty to GA teams?

Money trumps. Next question.

Where now then?

You can't buy the ALMS and kill it. It will show up again with a different name and different tracks. Some teams may jump ship to GA, but the fastest cars will not be in GA... and that will hurt their image. Whatever series comes out of the ashes with be a thorn in the side of GA... and add a couple of R15's to that mix... and GA is back at square one. Remember, the ALMS is not the series... it is the 25+ cars and their teams and owners. Buying Sebring won't save you... but there is another way...

Courting the Flying Lizards, Fiats, BMW's, and Vettes.

They bring the greatest proportion of fans... and money. The grubbers smell it at NASCAR. GA knows they need to get these teams/cars on board. Beg, borrow, steal, subsidize. Let me rephrase this... GT2 in ALMS is a (relative) goldmine. To pass it up would be plain stupid on a financial level. GT2 will be around next year, even if it has a new home.

Here is the problem: Ferrari will not support teams entering GA GT...that is the equivalent of marketing suicide. They would never allow defeat to a tube frame Pontiac. There was a good reason why they only showed up at Daytona.

What about the prototypes?

P1 will be dead soon. 2011 regulations will see to that. That leaves us with a possibility of Audi and Acura as filler (in North America) till then. That is another topic altogether.

Todays P2 will be tomorrows P1 in the world of Le Mans. The hope is that the 2011 specs will make it more affordable to run (good luck with that...). DP's have stability year to year. Le Mans prototypes do not. How does a race series engineer the best of both worlds?

More will be clarified in Part 5. Stay tuned, I will map out the prototype friendly structure of sports car racing in North America in 2010. With all of the rumors of GA buying up the ALMS... just don't be surprised if it resembles the ALMS more than GA.

Also, stay tuned for part 6 of the series: "Supporting the ALMS by getting your office involved with it's own Green Challenge by Michelin." Bring your calculators, it will be some fast paced, edge of your seat, feel-good, tree-hugging, accounting action!!! Scott A. will also be giving an exclusive not-to-be-missed interview.

You are welcome.

12: The shape of the ALMS to come: Part 3 of 7

An analysis on Grand Am vs: the ALMS

or

"How I learned to stop worrying and love the Grand Am."

Welcome back dear fans of premium, edge of your seat, sports car racing. In my last article we discussed hard financial numbers and rekindled our inner baking skills, and all for the better good of the sports car series we love. Expect miracles soon. Please stop emailing, I will be posting the recipe for my grandmother's pear pie very soon, as promised. The trick is to use pears that are still green as they will not turn to mush when baked.

Today by popular request (and by virtue that this is part 3 of 7 of my great Epic that is "The shape of the ALMS to come") the Serpent will begin to discuss exactly what the ALMS will look like down the road. I will admit, I have had a number of fans emailing me fearing the future... fearing if there will even be a future. But fear not, like your hero Scott A., I will calm you by focusing on a few marketing talking points until you fatigue, stop caring, and go home. Let us begin...

A primer on the ALMS:

Let us remember that the ALMS is basically an open public forum for manufacturers to design, innovate, and prove the might of their product. Even better, private coffers flip many of the bills. How good of a deal is that?!?! Innovate on Friday, join the ALMS on Saturday, win on Sunday, sell on Monday. The ALMS is merely a facilitator to the process (they might skim a few dollars profit also). They set up the show including race venues and TV coverage (including some network races) and persuade teams and sponsors to invest and join in the show to make it all possible.

The wee problem here is that the series is competing with teams for sponsorship, and that this model does not do so well in tough financial times because of a heavy reliance on major manufacturer/private support.

Moreover, if one manufacturer consistently proves difficult to beat... other manufacturers tire of the bad publicity and run. Some people don't like real competition... which makes for a nice lead in to...

A Primer on the Grand AM:

This is racing for the simple man. Keep it simple, keep it cheap, keep it close. DP's represent a poor man's prototype. The series gives manufacturers credit for the chassis and engine... so they are kept happy. Development on these cars is nill, which is great because it also cuts out development costs for teams/manufacturers. Exposure with minimal effort/expenditure by the manufacturer/team. Race DP's, sell GT's.

Teams like it because they are being subsidized to stay in the series (race winnings, cash handouts from NASCAR to keep teams/car/drivers in the series). GA is also a better place to be competitive if you have a team with a lower budget. Everyone uses the same antiquated DP's, and if one becomes dominant... they get flowers, a race trophy, and a performance penalty.

There is more catering to sponsors. GA gives sponsors lots of flat surfaces for their DP's. Remember, those cars were designed with one goal in mind... not looks, not speed, not safety, but MAXIMAL surface area for banners. They don't call DP's "a banner on 4 wheels" for nothing. The world's fastest and most technologically advanced billboard that also happens to be a car.

Finally, GA is an attempt to appeal to both the NASCAR and Sports Car crowds. They appeal to NASCAR fans by keeping things simple and competitive... and Sports car fans buy driving on tracks that are not some variation of the egg shape, and throwing in a few actual sports cars too.

Obviously, with less dependence and cost to manufacturers, they are not hurt AS MUCH as the ALMS in bad times. Plus, manufacturers that don't like all out competition (i.e. looking bad in the face of the public when they are lapped by an import, race after race) may be happy to be in Grand AM. They also have the 800lb gorilla behind them in the form of NASCAR (translation: deeper pockets in the war of financial attrition with the ALMS).

However, rumor would have it that the NASCAR war chest is being dipped into quite a lot this year with all the subsidizing that has been going around. The dozen fans at the races certainly are not paying for it. Oh yeah... sponsors/teams/manufacturers don't like the lack of viewers/fans/exposure/interest. The only thing they have going for them right now is an 800lb gorilla (that is feeling the hard economic times itself).

If the series actually had fans they would all be pretty scared right now... even 800lb gorillas don't like to keep dead weight for long.

What is GA to do?

Step one. Monopoly. Get rid of your opponent... or buy it and own it. Here is the twist: Money grubbers also call the shots on the NASCAR side of the fence. Which series can make them the most money? Hint: money grubbers want to grub money from as many people as possible. They already have the money of NASCAR fans... so they want control of a series with a different appeal/fan base. Guess who? The # of fans in the GA stands is your hint...

More food for thought for part 4: How do you buy out all or some of a series and not have it turn up the next year in a different form... competing for your dollar? Hint: Sebring will not save GA from itself. The grubbers know it.

You are welcome!